I need me one of these!Men In Black Memory Eraser
This device will clear up your memory within a flash. It would come in handy in every situation especially if you have a tendency of screwing up everything. Did you mess up the work at office? Flash it at the boss. Is someone angry with you? Give him a flash. Did your lover dump you? Flash it at yourself! I can solve every problem of this world using this gadget.
Wow yesterday was the afternoon from "Yuck Town". It has been a long time since I have been a CRAZY mom. The out of control kind that looses her head and her words just heave out like VOMIT, word vomit. Let me explain.
First off picking up the kids in the heat is the Crap, Crap,Crappiest thing I have to do Monday through Friday. My mind gets foggy, my feet begin to burn, sweat drips and my eyes become all to comfy with the bright. So when I get home I am a "MESS". My head hurts, my clothes (all million layers of them) are wet, my feet are producing some sort of steam from the quick introduction to AC and I can't see a stinking thing except little bright spots. I HATE IT!!
Well on this particular day the heat and sun were not the worse source of energy sucking me up. THEY WERE, all four of them. As soon as I see them after school all they talk about is how they are going to sell tons of stuff from the dumb catalog and earn all kinds of prizes. Um, no we don't sell stuff. All the way home they tried to convince me how great it would be to win an IPhone or just a key chain would do, Please mom. I yelled something like, "I DON'T GIVE A STINK WE ARE NOT DOING IT". Because of all of the showing me stuff they could win and begging I kept running into them with the stroller and spilling my soda. JUST WALK!! I decided to fall back and let them get WAY ahead.
When I got home there was catalog sales paper, shoes, socks , back packs and agendas all over my freshly cleaned house. I yelled and then took a minute to regain visibility and yelled some more. Maggie being helpful said something to the tune of, " I got a yellow light today at school but I don't care because I am going to win prizes." That's when papers started flying into the garbage, tears started to flow and Maggie went upstairs for a nap.
Homework went exceptionally the same way. Lots of yelling, a little bit of doing, an unhappy toddler and no cooperation. This went on right up until we figured out we were running late for piano. Yelled a little, rushed out the door and threatened Spencer with his life he had another piano lesson like last week. That is when he kindly let me know, "Mom I actually do better with encouragement". Stink that bomb, right?
Turns out I just needed a little time to myself to BREATHE. Between the scorching school pick up, dumb school sales, yellow lights, fussing toddler, homework and endless kids needs my air had been clean sucked right out of me. I have to breathe or something horrible happens and I turn into Psycho Mom.
And now I need one of these....
For them..........
And maybe him.........
Because they are really great! AND when they get older and they are sharing stories about when they were younger (especially with their therapist) I want their stories to reflect this..........
And not what happened on a hot deserty September day after school.
7 comments:
You've got it, this is going to make you millions. Every mom in the world would want one of those!!! I love your writing, I could picture everything!
I love it!! Just know you are SO NOT alone. I'm glad you shared... makes me feel better that I'm not the only "psycho" mom. I am even more thrilled to hear that I am not alone in not wanting to do all the dumb fundraisers! I've been hearing about that all week because my kids are the ONLY two kids in the whole school that haven't earned a duck yet!!
Just remind yourself that "Time-Out for Women" is just around the corner...it's working for me!
we all have those days. And I don't let my kids sell crap either ! I'd rather just donate $20 to the school if that's what the goal is, and have my kiddo save up his own $5 for the frisbee that's gonna break next week. the good thing is, you recognize insane Mom when she surfaces, so you're most likely to kick her back into the closet the next time she comes around. :)
I hate those fundraisers as well. You should check out my blog about our fun time with those things. Good thing days like those are locked away in our memory and when they're talking to their therapists years from now they will remember all the good times and hardly any of those awful days.
Fundraisers at school should be banned. Like Bare Midriffs they only lead us down a dark path.
LOVE the fact that I am not alone with the whole somedays after school it is really hard to be a calm, patient, understanding mom. Especially in this heat!!!
I AM READY FOR FALL NOW ARIZONA!!!
I just love your writing. You should think about writing a book. Thanks for sharing, now I know I am not alone in those not so good moments as a mommy.
If you find one I need one too. I have had way to many of those. Tell me how you have to few. We are getting better but who knew motherhood would be such a challenge.
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